10 Top Funniest Facebook Jokes, Quotes & Updates This Week [eps.21]

Every day, I come across a few hilarious Facebook updates, jokes & quotes. Some of them are so funny, that I actually feel stupid laughing all by myself!

Therefore, I invite you to invite you to enjoy our 21st list of the 10 top funniest list for this week.

1. My grandfather always said, “Don’t watch your money; watch your health.” So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole my money. It was my grandfather!

2. One day, I showed up late for work. The boss yelled “You should have been here at 8:30!” I replied: “Why? What happened at 8:30?”

3. My sister was with two men in one night. She could hardly walk after that. Can you imagine? Two dinners!

4. I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.

5. The only reason people get lost in thought is because it’s unfamiliar territory.6. To generalize on women is dangerous. To specialize on them is infinitely worse.

7. If ugliness was a crime, you would be serving 3 life sentences.

8. I’ve been in love with the same woman for 49 years. If my wife ever finds out, she would kill me!

9. A murderer, sitting in the electric chair, was about to be executed. “Have you any last requests? Asked the chaplain. “Yes,” replied the murderer. “Will you hold my hand?”

10. Note – The key to a good relationship is the key. Give me back the key.

Hope you had a good laugh! :)

Looking forward to reading more of your favorite funniest Facebook updates, jokes or quotes in the comments section below.

Posted by Beirut on May 27, 2011.

Tags: AMP Energy, boss, comic, dark, electric chair, facebook, Facebook Inc, fun, funny, Human Interest, humor, joke, jokes, Laughter, Offbeat, Online social networking, quotes, relationship, sayings, Technology/Internet, Thought, women, World Wide Web

Categories: Offbeat