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10 Top Funniest Facebook Jokes, Quotes & Updates This Week [eps.24]

Every day, I come across a few hilarious Facebook updates, jokes & quotes. Some of them are so funny, that I actually feel stupid laughing all by myself!

Therefore, I invite you to invite you to enjoy our 24th list of the 10 top funniest list for this week.

Photo By *Joélisa*

Photo By *Joélisa*

1. Sticks & stones may break my bones, BUT chains & whips excite me!

2. A priest asks Johnny if he’s scared of Satan. Little Johnny says “I have nothing to b scared of you are the one that must be scared; you talk crap about him every Sunday……”

3. Autocorrect can kiss my ask..!!

4. My wife’s jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.

5. The average power nap is 20 minutes. This works out well because I can fit 3 of them evenly into one hour.

6. If you blink your eyes really fast, it looks like there are strobe lights in the room. I have been having random parties throughout the day!

7. I am wondering why Facebook bothers to give the option of “liking” my own comment? Of course I like my own comments. I’m awesome :p

8. I like to stop the microwave with 1 second to go. Makes me feel like a bomb defusal expert!!

9. I love in horror movies how the person yells out “hello?!” as if the killer is gonna say “yeah I’m in the kitchen, want a sandwich?”

10. When butterflies are in love, do they feel human’s in their stomach? :)

Hope you had a good laugh! :)

Looking forward to reading more of your favorite funniest Facebook updates, jokes or quotes in the comments section below.

Posted by on July 7, 2011.

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Categories: Offbeat

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